Skip to main content

Christmas Present Tips for Guys

Christmas Shopping Tips for Guys

giftgreen1Most of us guys are useless at Christmas shopping. Here's a few tips I've picked up over the years.

Ladies, you might want to share this with the men in your family to avoid getting an undesirable and badly wrapped present this Christmas.

  1. Buying your Christmas presents at a petrol station or dairy on Christmas morning really isn't the done thing - apparently not everyone wants a funnel, box of biscuits or a car care kit. Don't do it.
  2. Get started early, no not on Christmas Eve, yesterday was already too late.
  3. First thing in the morning is the best time to Christmas shop, and I mean first thing, teenagers are still in bed.
  4. It's not the thought that counts, it's how MUCH thought that counts.
  5. Cash is a GREAT present for teenagers - and me.
  6. If you must give gift vouchers make sure they are from a shop the recipient actually shops in and try and avoid those with an expiry date.
  7. Wrapping and cards are important, you and I know it's just paper but for some reason they are important.
  8. Before you start browsing in a shop check that it does gift wrapping and accept the service - wait if necessary. If the shop doesn't do gift wrapping move on to the next. Unless you are an expert present wrapper - Yeah Right!
  9. Even if every present you buy is gift wrapped, buy plenty of wrapping paper and sellotape. You are going to need it because dairy's and petrol stations don't gift wrap and being a bloke you'll probably ignore number 1.

Guys ignore the above at your peril and have a wonderful Christmas.

Best Round Ever

strangleA doctor was at the club for his weekly round of golf. He began his round with an eagle on the first hole and a birdie on the second. On the third hole he had just scored his first ever hole in one when his cell phone rang. It was another doctor notifying him that his wife had just been in a terrible accident and was in critical condition and in the ICU.

The golfer told the doctor to inform his wife where he was and that the he’d be there as soon as possible. As he hung up he realized he was leaving what was shaping up to be his best ever round of golf. He decided to get in a couple of more holes before heading to the hospital. He ended up finishing all 18. He finished his round, shooting a personal best 61, shattering the club record by five strokes and beating his previous best game by more than 10.

He was jubilant, then he remembered his wife. Feeling guilty he dashed to the hospital. He saw his wife’s doctor in the corridor and asked about his wife’s condition. The doctor glared at him and shouted: "You went ahead and finished your round of golf didn’t you? I hope you’re proud of yourself! While you were out for the past four hours enjoying yourself at the country club, your wife has been languishing in the ICU. It’s just as well you went ahead and finished that round because it will be more than likely your last! For the rest of her life she will require round the clock care. And you’ll be her care giver!”

The husband was feeling so guilty he broke down and sobbed. The doctor started to snicker and said: “Just kidding! She died more than two hours ago. What’d you shoot?”

Jokes

  • Last updated on .